Admitting that you’re a vegetarian with a fear of cheese is awkward enough. Admitting that you’re a 27-year-old vegetarian with a fear of melted cheese because it reminds you of snot is even worse.

But this aversion to squeaky, chewy, greasy cheese that leaves a taste lasting hours is getting more out of hand the older I get. So tonight I decided to face it head on – with my first fondue.

Call it First World problems, but the idea of facing a massive bowl of sloppy, stringy cheese was enough to make me want to heave all day. So I tracked down the darkest venue I could find, knowing that way I wouldn’t have to see the cheese – and more importantly, no one would have to see me gagging.

Dylan and I went to The Bourgeois Pig on 7th and A and ordered the Mushroom Royale. It came with a tray of rosemary potatoes, bread bites, fruit and pickled vegetables – more than enough for two.

And of course, it was amazing. At first I dipped apprehensively, but by the end I was slathering gooey cheese on the vegetables. It turns out this was easy after all. That being said, this was good quality stuff. Nothing squeaky or chewy about it.

With the wine flowing, it turned out to be a delicious meal and I really enjoyed the variety – almost like a picnic. I’d be interested to see what the other flavours at the Pig are like – and a few hours ago, I never thought I’d ever say that.

Cheese whizz, didn’t I do gouda? Who knew I’d ever Brie a fan? etc etc…